How about telling some jokes? - Page 2

Leonie · 07-12-2004, 09:39 PM

Hmmm. That sanity stuff is from Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul, isn't it? Awesome book

Yes, I'm that pathetic. So?

Ashley · 07-12-2004, 09:59 PM

Chicken Soup for the Soul any of the books, are awesome. I used to read them and just sob. I loved them.

Back on topic: A smart blonde, a stupid blonde and Santa Claus play poker, who wins?

The stupid blonde because the other two don't exist.

Mags · 07-12-2004, 10:16 PM

Since the only really terrible joke I know is quite regional, here's one for all the Texans.

How many Aggies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

13. 1 to do it and 12 to die trying.

Ashley · 07-12-2004, 11:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mags

Since the only really terrible joke I know is quite regional, here's one for all the Texans.

How many Aggies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

13. 1 to do it and 12 to die trying.

Was the in reference to the bonfire incident? Wasn't that the Aggies?

Mags · 08-12-2004, 02:32 AM

Yeah...it was. In...1999 I believe, while participating in the annual Aggie Bonfire, the bonfire collapsed and killed twelve students.

There's also been a long-standing saying at A&M about the "12th Man" though I have no idea what it's about.

I just know any Aggie who heard that joke would probably be inclined to beat me up.

hasselbrad · 08-12-2004, 03:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hazzle

A good friend will die for you. A great friend will kill for you.

A good friend will come and bail you out of jail. A great friend will be sitting next to you in the cell saying, "damn...that was fun."

Hazzle · 08-12-2004, 04:40 PM

A friend'll help you move. A good friend will help you move bodies.

Ashley · 08-12-2004, 05:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mags

There's also been a long-standing saying at A&M about the "12th Man" though I have no idea what it's about.

The 12th man refers to football. There are 11 starters and then the 1st sub would be the 12th man, but they're respecting all players by saying they are all the 12th men.... it's the same as basketball's 6th man.

Pygmalion · 08-12-2004, 09:35 PM

Saw a good legend on a T-shirt
Lol more clowns

"Rape is no laughing matter
Unless you're raping a clown"

Hazzle · 08-12-2004, 10:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pygmalion

Saw a good legend on a T-shirt
Lol more clowns

"Rape is no laughing matter
Unless you're raping a clown"

Arrr. Love that! I still liked that T-shirt your mate is making for you "I fucked your girlfriend". I want one like that

hasselbrad · 08-12-2004, 10:54 PM

Martha Stewart's recipe for chicken casserole is very quick.
Boil the chicken.
Dump the stock.

Hazzle · 08-12-2004, 10:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hasselbrad

Martha Stewart's recipe for chicken casserole is very quick.
Boil the chicken.
Dump the stock.

ARRRR.

Ok, I heard some funny election slogans, so here's one:

"If he loses, he promises not to kill himself, if he wins, he promises not to kill you"

Ranman · 10-12-2004, 09:26 AM

Lets try one more

one saturday night 3 buddies were out having a good time drinking.
they parted eachother's company around 3 am.
the next night they all met up with eachother.
the first guy says man i got so wasted last night
i went home and blew chunks. the second guy says i got
so bombed ion the way home i stopped to take a leak
and pissed on a cop car. the third guy said you think thats bad
i had to take a shit and stopped next to this building and took
my dump and feel asleep there and woke up next to a church with
people all around me. the first guy says you two dont understand
how bad it really is, chunks is my dog.

Hazzle · 10-12-2004, 11:47 AM

ROFL. Love it. Another priceless joke. GG chief, keep em up

CFC · 10-12-2004, 08:02 PM

So a dyslexic walks into a bra............................................

Hazzle · 11-12-2004, 12:21 AM

This isn't so much a joke as a funny true life story. Yes, some guy really did this.

One of my old lecturers from my masters course is now at Cambridge and was interviewing applicants for admission. Applicants had been given materials on several topics to do with law and law reform etc and asked to discuss their views in the interview. One of the topics was research which showed that the male brain tended to be more analytical, focussed on deconstructing what the cases say, what the statutes say, and arriving at what the law "is", whereas the female brain tended to put the law in its sociological context, adding emotion and things such as ethics and morals. Now this wasn't to disparage women, far from it, it was to say they bring a different perspective which, speaking as a law student, helped me change my own mindset and become more contextual. ANYWAY, that's all the boring shit. The article then looked at law schools, and how law is taught in a very..."masculine" way...and thus unfairly disfavoured women, making it harder for women to succeed in the legal profession, and the question put to the students applying to Cambridge was...what should law schools do to address this.

And one bright spark, predicted straight As at A-level, apparently a good applicant but for this one thing, decided that if that's how women thought, the job of law schools was to teach women how to think like men

. You know how they say there are some questions that have no wrong or right answer? Well that was probably the ONLY wrong answer...needless to say he didn't get a place.

Meh...I found it funny, not saying much I suppose, maybe you had to be there? <shrugs>.

Pygmalion · 11-12-2004, 07:37 AM

I got another baby joke!

Q What do you call a dead baby with a broken jaw?

A Deep Throat

Flightfreak · 11-12-2004, 07:16 PM

i was cleaning up my hard disc and i found this funny * card virus*

Pygmalion · 12-12-2004, 10:36 PM

Q. whats funnier than a dead baby?
A. A dead baby sitting next to a kid with down syndrome

marry rich people · 12-12-2004, 10:58 PM

What is with all these dead baby jokes? Did a dead baby make fun of you and emotionally scar you when you were little?

07-12-2004, 09:39 PM	#21
Leonie Elle Join Date: May 2003 Location: Nottingham Posts: 2,631	Hmmm. That sanity stuff is from Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul, isn't it? Awesome book Yes, I'm that pathetic. So? __________________

07-12-2004, 10:16 PM	#23
Mags Officer Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Uni Posts: 423	Since the only really terrible joke I know is quite regional, here's one for all the Texans. How many Aggies does it take to screw in a light bulb? 13. 1 to do it and 12 to die trying. __________________ That, is shagging well ridiculous

08-12-2004, 02:32 AM	#25
Mags Officer Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Uni Posts: 423	Yeah...it was. In...1999 I believe, while participating in the annual Aggie Bonfire, the bonfire collapsed and killed twelve students. There's also been a long-standing saying at A&M about the "12th Man" though I have no idea what it's about. I just know any Aggie who heard that joke would probably be inclined to beat me up. __________________ That, is shagging well ridiculous

08-12-2004, 09:35 PM	#29
Pygmalion Pissed Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Australia Posts: 856	Saw a good legend on a T-shirt Lol more clowns "Rape is no laughing matter Unless you're raping a clown" __________________ Mythpathe

08-12-2004, 10:54 PM	#31
hasselbrad Senior Citizen Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Sugar Hill, GA... finally! Civilization! Posts: 4,590	Martha Stewart's recipe for chicken casserole is very quick. Boil the chicken. Dump the stock. __________________ "Purgatory's kind of like the in-betweeny one. You weren't really shit, but you weren't all that great either. Like Tottenham." I'll try being nicer...if you'll try being smarter.

07-12-2004, 09:59 PM	#22
Ashley Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Kansas Posts: 594	Chicken Soup for the Soul any of the books, are awesome. I used to read them and just sob. I loved them. Back on topic: A smart blonde, a stupid blonde and Santa Claus play poker, who wins? The stupid blonde because the other two don't exist.

08-12-2004, 04:40 PM	#27
Hazzle Sponsored Cunt Join Date: Jun 2004 Posts: 5,168	A friend'll help you move. A good friend will help you move bodies.

10-12-2004, 09:26 AM	#33
Ranman KKW's Therapist Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: Traveling the world Posts: 2,065	Lets try one more one saturday night 3 buddies were out having a good time drinking. they parted eachother's company around 3 am. the next night they all met up with eachother. the first guy says man i got so wasted last night i went home and blew chunks. the second guy says i got so bombed ion the way home i stopped to take a leak and pissed on a cop car. the third guy said you think thats bad i had to take a shit and stopped next to this building and took my dump and feel asleep there and woke up next to a church with people all around me. the first guy says you two dont understand how bad it really is, chunks is my dog.

10-12-2004, 11:47 AM	#34
Hazzle Sponsored Cunt Join Date: Jun 2004 Posts: 5,168	ROFL. Love it. Another priceless joke. GG chief, keep em up

10-12-2004, 08:02 PM	#35
CFC Lord Cock Inhaler Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: USA, NC Posts: 528	So a dyslexic walks into a bra............................................ __________________ +1

11-12-2004, 12:21 AM	#36
Hazzle Sponsored Cunt Join Date: Jun 2004 Posts: 5,168	This isn't so much a joke as a funny true life story. Yes, some guy really did this. One of my old lecturers from my masters course is now at Cambridge and was interviewing applicants for admission. Applicants had been given materials on several topics to do with law and law reform etc and asked to discuss their views in the interview. One of the topics was research which showed that the male brain tended to be more analytical, focussed on deconstructing what the cases say, what the statutes say, and arriving at what the law "is", whereas the female brain tended to put the law in its sociological context, adding emotion and things such as ethics and morals. Now this wasn't to disparage women, far from it, it was to say they bring a different perspective which, speaking as a law student, helped me change my own mindset and become more contextual. ANYWAY, that's all the boring shit. The article then looked at law schools, and how law is taught in a very..."masculine" way...and thus unfairly disfavoured women, making it harder for women to succeed in the legal profession, and the question put to the students applying to Cambridge was...what should law schools do to address this. And one bright spark, predicted straight As at A-level, apparently a good applicant but for this one thing, decided that if that's how women thought, the job of law schools was to teach women how to think like men . You know how they say there are some questions that have no wrong or right answer? Well that was probably the ONLY wrong answer...needless to say he didn't get a place. Meh...I found it funny, not saying much I suppose, maybe you had to be there? <shrugs>.

11-12-2004, 07:37 AM	#37
Pygmalion Pissed Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Australia Posts: 856	I got another baby joke! Q What do you call a dead baby with a broken jaw? A Deep Throat __________________ Mythpathe

12-12-2004, 10:36 PM	#39
Pygmalion Pissed Join Date: Jun 2004 Location: Australia Posts: 856	Q. whats funnier than a dead baby? A. A dead baby sitting next to a kid with down syndrome __________________ Mythpathe

12-12-2004, 10:58 PM	#40
marry rich people Member Join Date: Sep 2004 Location: U.S. Posts: 156	What is with all these dead baby jokes? Did a dead baby make fun of you and emotionally scar you when you were little? __________________ You say, somethings wrong This Kind of life style doesn't work I'm trying something else For a change, for a change Thats ok, ok, ok

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