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Even though it is only one sentence, I think you were right to spot a certain poetical rhythm.
When I read it out loud, somehow it feels more natural to break line 10 and 11 up in a different way (and that without / a radical critique / of gender / consitution ... ). However, the way you have broken it up gives new meaning to those lines (and that without a radical, critique of gender ... ) and for that, I take my proverbial hat off to you.
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