Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: seattle, washington
Dyce, I'm going to offer what I would do if I were in your situation.
First off, it ain't about being yourself. That's lame, and boring. And it ain't about being a faker either. What you want is to represent yourself in a position of power. In short, you need confidence. What I suggest you do is walk around like you own this high school. Walk tall, walk with a straight back, and walk with a manly swagger. But don't overdo the swagger. It helps to buy good clothes too. Personally I like to wear nice leather shoes, a white dress shirt that's a little tight, but still loose and untucked, and unbuttoned the top two buttons (3 if you include the collar button) and unbutton the wrist buttons. You want a sloppy style, like you just don't give a f*ck. Next, a pair of some faded jeans is always needed; darker blue jeans is preferable as the fade contrast is very noticable. It doesn't hurt to have a nice watch and a couple of rings and maybe a necklace, but jewelry isn't necessary. This is just an example, I encourage you to find your own style. If you feel confident about the way you dress, you'll definately feel confident about the way you present yourself to others.
Next, you need to work on your voice. If you have a piano or something, you can press the alto keys and figure out which tone you like best. Everyday before school, for 15 minutes, I want you to hum this tone. And focus on the tone while you're humming. If you really are a nervous wreck, I want you to do this 3 times a day. Clarity and voice tone are very important. The lower tone voice you can pull off, generally, the better you are but don't go really deep, some women like the alto sounds anyway.
What you're trying to do with these things is get the woman to pursue you! You want to change the object of desire from her and put yourself in a position where you are the object of desire for her and she's the one with the nervous breakdown.
One trick is to do your homework and maybe even get ahead in your classes. When the teacher asks a question to the class, answer it with your newly found voice tone. It will get her to notice you. And do it on more than one occasion.
Another trick is when she's walking down the hallway, look at her in the eyes and if she looks back at you, don't be a pussy, maintain that eye contact. And whatever it is that you were doing, just stop. The only that should be moving is your head following her. If she shys away or whatever, keep looking at her until she's outta sight. That way if she makes a quick glance again, she knows you're still checking her out. If it turns into a staring competition for about 5 minutes or so, walk up to her and gently and slowly play with her hair or get really close, face to face. What you want to do here is let the woman initiate verbal communication. If she never says anything, continue to bring up the level of body language until she does say something. Body language says alot more than words.
And finally, talk to the girl. Who cares about her friend? so what? If she burns you, hit on her friend, yeah! Find ways to be with her. Like join her group or bump into her from time to time. I usually start conversation with compliments about what she's wearing or how well her complexion looks or how nice her hair is. From that you generally want to probe her and find out what you guys have in common and go from there. And after you've had a really great converstion full of energy, end things lightly and start walking away. Then stop yourself midway, and politely ask for her phone number. Be like, O and by the way, write down your phone number so we can continue this discussion another time. Again, the body language is important. It's as if you don't care whether or not you get her digits.
When you do call her, keep things light and concise and to the point. Get her to go to lunch or something but don't drone on about your day on the phone. You want to do most of your talking, face to face.
This is all just my opinion. You can take it however seriously you want. ANd if she does burn you, I mean, it's not the end of the world. There will be others. You can't force her to love you, so just move on.
Ordinarly I would not write a response like this. But you recommended me to stay away from the expensive proactiv shiet and I thank you for it. I was thinking of using it myself.
I against I,
flesh of my flesh,
and mind of my mind,
two of a kind but one won't survive,
my images reflect in the enemies eye,
and his images reflect in mine the same time,