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Pygmalion 29-10-2004 09:15 AM

Problems
 
Hey everyone, haven't been around for a while, but I REALLY need some help:

Ok. For almost a year I've been with my girlfriend, coincidentally for almost a year I've also been pretty screwed up ie: not eating, getting really depressed, cutting myself, that sort of thing.
So I'm in the middle of my final exams which determine whether or not I get into the university I want, and my girlfriend decides to tell me she cheated on me three times last weekend-blaming it on alcohol which I can sort of understand-but she wasn't going to tell me. She only told me because she was drunk when she was talking to me. Well as you could probably expect, I felt REALLY brilliant. We've been fighting on and off for about a week-during which I didn't do much study-and in every fight she manages to turn everything round and make ME feel guilty! Eg: "its your fault I gave Steve a handjob because you tuned off your phone."
After many tearful conversations with various friends I still don't have an answer. I cut myself more than usual and haven't eaten in 2 days, but I can't bring myself to break up with her. I know she manipulates me and makes me feel like shit, but i have a bizarre emotional attachment. I told her I trust her this weekend (more drunken nights out) but...
What do I do?

ryan 29-10-2004 11:41 AM

you didn't put the alcohol in her system
you didn't put her on top of or make her touch another guy

it's 100% her fault. don't succumb to that manipulative bullshit. so your phone was off, big fucking deal. that doesn't mean she can do anything with other guys.
not your fault at all.

she needs to either take a hike or take the blame for what happened and really beg for forgiveness.

Hazzle 29-10-2004 04:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ryan
you didn't put the alcohol in her system
you didn't put her on top of or make her touch another guy

it's 100% her fault. don't succumb to that manipulative bullshit. so your phone was off, big fucking deal. that doesn't mean she can do anything with other guys.
not your fault at all.

she needs to either take a hike or take the blame for what happened and really beg for forgiveness.

What he said. I did also kinda tell you this darling (yeah, apologies for the late reply on the latest email :()...I'm sure every single post here will agree you did nothing wrong.

Although...what'd you mean "another" guy? Pygs here is of the feminine persuasion dude...that's quite offensive :p

hasselbrad 29-10-2004 04:58 PM

If being with someone causes you to do the things you say she makes you do, then that person isn't worth being with. Other than that, I don't know what to tell you.

Hazzle 29-10-2004 05:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by hasselbrad
If being with someone causes you to do the things you say she makes you do, then that person isn't worth being with. Other than that, I don't know what to tell you.

<nods>. Hassel be a wise man...truth.

Noone's worth that. If she doesn't appreciate you, then she's not worth you doing that shit over, and she's certainly not worthy of having you in her life. I know you, better than most here I'd venture to guess, and I think you're fucking great...if she doesn't realise how lucky she is, that's her problem.

duckula 29-10-2004 09:11 PM

Tell her you cheated on her, contracted AIDS and that she probably has it now. Then dump her.

Sarah 29-10-2004 09:30 PM

Dump her and find yourself a real woman.

Hazzle 30-10-2004 01:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by duckula
Tell her you cheated on her, contracted AIDS and that she probably has it now. Then dump her.

I like Ducky's plan. See this is why I always go to Teh Duck for advice on how to deal with a sticky situation...he always knows what to do.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sarah
Dump her and find yourself a real woman.

Is that an invitation Sarah? I didn't know you swung that way (what do I care, it's all good fuel for the mental images ;))

barrington 30-10-2004 03:46 PM

Hazzle's got more unused testosterone than a rabid stoat. And that's quite a lot.

bob 30-10-2004 04:27 PM

firstly, dump the daft bitch. and try to do it when you're sober so that you'll remember that she IS a bitch (what are you doing getting drunk during finals?)

secondly, forget the hsc. there are other ways to get into the uni course you want. don't let it get you down because if you really think about it, it's not worth all the stress and depression (am i trying to convince you or myself? heh...)

edit: scrap that, don't forget the hsc. stop drinking, get to studying, try and do as well as you can given the time you have left. but don't let the implications of this milestone get you down. once it's over, it's over. just gotta move on... the same could be said about your girlfriend.

Hazzle 30-10-2004 10:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by barrington
Hazzle's got more unused testosterone than a rabid stoat. And that's quite a lot.

So it's you I have to thank for the spiffy new title? I'm LOVING it. It's true what you say too...more's the pity...anyone care to help me use that which is going to waste? :p

Bob <gasp> you're being such a bad influence on young Pygs. Do not forget about the HSC. If for nothing else than because those are my initials and I'll be MAJOR fucking pissed if young Pygs here forgot about moi :p

bob 31-10-2004 03:21 AM

haz, are those seriously your initials?

the hsc sucks mucho asso. i find it's easier for me to give advice, rather than take it. so i'm a major ass hypocrite. i can be like "study, yeah, be organised, don't stress, it's not a big deal" and what am i doing? the exact opposite of everything i say.

IT SUCKS. i didn't answer half my paper on friday or my maths one on the previous monday, i didn't finish two essays for my two english papers. i'm doing worse than my trials, i had an estimate of 82 when my previous estimate was 89.5 and i was trying to get up to 92. i'm doing worse in the actual hsc meaning i'll probably do worse than my estimate. i'm going to get a uai under 80. i won't be elligible for ANY of my selected courses, i'm not going to get into UNI. i've fucked up big time.

but on that note, it's not the end of the world... :(

Hazzle 31-10-2004 11:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bob
haz, are those seriously your initials?

True story. My initials are synonymous with excrutiating pain...how surprising :p

I'm with Ashlyn on this Pygs...you know I am. Don't let it fuck you over. I've told you what I think you should do, but it can wait...and yeah...focus on the HSC, because end of the world or not (and Bob is right on that...it's not the end of the world fucking up exams, no matter how important they are) you'll be mad at yourself if the REASON you fuck up is some girl who quite frankly isn't fit to lick your boots (although I suppose it's not your boots you get her to lick ;) Sorry, bad joke...but it was too obvious not to make it...). Focus on the HSC, anything else is a secondary consideration for now. Right now it's fucking your head up and you don't need that.

barrington 01-11-2004 01:26 AM

quoth duck: Women are whores. Why lie?

Hazzle 01-11-2004 01:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by barrington
quoth duck: Women are whores. Why lie?

True. At least men are honest about being sex-obsessed. We're honest about being whores.

bob 01-11-2004 02:06 AM

it's called the virgin-whore dichotomy. men want whores, but they won't stay with them.

so we're whores but we keep up the pretense of being nice and innocent so that you won't go WHORING AROUND WITH THE SECRETARY!

you man whores.

-obviously i know nothing about the virgin-whore dichotomy, but it's fun to abuse you :)

Pygmalion 01-11-2004 07:11 AM

ok, well we sorta broke up on sunday, and in that time I ripped up all her photos and letters and put them in a shoe box with "SLUT" on the top, then cried to my good friend for a few hours, during which we plotted out revenge, then *SHE* called me and said she wouldn't do it again and wanted to get back with me and me being the gutless person that I am, said ok.
SORT of regretting that now, but I can't seem to let go. Even when she told me I'm mentally ill.
By the way Bob, I WASN't drinking during my HSC lol.

bob 01-11-2004 11:50 AM

your girl is a ho. i would bitch slap her... if i met her. actually i probably wouldn't, i'm intimidated by strangers. i think you seriously need to look at her (her personality/character, not her appearance :p ) don't think about your relationship with her. just review her for what she is, not what's she done for you or what she's said to you. i think you'll come to realise that the person she is, isn't very nice.

and good for you for not drinking during the hsc. cos that'd be a bad idea.

Hazzle 02-11-2004 01:18 AM

She deserves a bitch-slap, no doubt. Whore.

Although Bob's point actually works quite well...I'd say men want whores but want to think they're innocent (hence the male obsession with schoolgirl outfits).

But Bob dearest...in rebuttal...women want men who're cunts...so we're SUPPOSED to whore ourselves around...as Green Day sang..."Nice Guys Finish Last".

bob 02-11-2004 02:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hazzle
She deserves a bitch-slap, no doubt. Whore.

Although Bob's point actually works quite well...I'd say men want whores but want to think they're innocent (hence the male obsession with schoolgirl outfits).

But Bob dearest...in rebuttal...women want men who're cunts...so we're SUPPOSED to whore ourselves around...as Green Day sang..."Nice Guys Finish Last".

we should note that all the green day members are married and billie joe armstrong drives a bmw (luxury family car)

women don't want men who are cunts (because that would mean women want women ;) ) and generally the worst thing a guy could do is cheat. people say that the 'nice' guy finishes last, that's not because he's necessarily a 'nice' guy, he's just a push-over without a personality who can't connect with the people around him. an actual nice guy is one who WOULDN'T CHEAT.


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