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View Full Version : So I got my left testicle caught in the shower door


Glare
25-08-2004, 06:09 AM
OUCH!

I had to have it surgically removed now. Like, because it hangs lower than my right testicle, when I was getting out, the door slammed, and it sliced open my nutsack.

I could actually see the veins and shit that carry the semen, and it was gushing blood and shit. Fuck man I fainted, and my girlfriend came in and was like OMFG and she called an ambulance. They hooked me up to some oxygen, and we were all laughing at how I'm gonna have only one nut.


Then I stopped laughing.

Glare
25-08-2004, 06:11 AM
Do testicles grow back?

Glare
25-08-2004, 06:13 AM
I was slipping through the door, very narrow, and they got caught on a sharp edge of the shower door. You know those really cheap shower doors with the really thin metal? That's what sliced me open. FUCK!

acliff
25-08-2004, 06:17 AM
Why don't you kick another woman in the head to relieve your stress?

Pinkfairy
25-08-2004, 06:20 AM
LMAO
Ha, and to think that some would give their left nut to go through a life changing experience, or to simply hear a story like yours...
Maybe you should sit and wait for it to grow.

Jacoby
25-08-2004, 06:22 AM
I honestly didn't think you had any nuts to begin with.

Narg
25-08-2004, 06:28 AM
You fool :icon_err:

keira_lover
25-08-2004, 06:29 AM
OUCH! What can I say, that fucking sucks dude.

deviljet88
25-08-2004, 09:05 AM
Wow that story is sooo cool! Tell another one!

hasselbrad
25-08-2004, 12:21 PM
A friend of mine in college claimed to know a kid who got his nutsack hung on a nail while trying to slide out of a treehouse. Said his left nut came undone like the windings of an old golf ball, and was one long string that followed him all the way into the house, where he passed out. :icon_redf

Mandy
25-08-2004, 01:04 PM
You can be a girl now :D You have my support.

Pete
25-08-2004, 01:39 PM
:icon_surp :icon_surp :icon_surp holy cow batman

i just saw that topic and winced... rather you than me!

meegaan1
25-08-2004, 02:56 PM
I once new a guy who sat on an open stapler and got a staples in the balls...He was alright though. Sorry dude.

Richard
25-08-2004, 05:35 PM
I've read everyone's comments, but I still can't figure out if that story is actually true?

kilyncw
25-08-2004, 05:44 PM
you're not alone bro, a friend of mine dropped a razor on his dick in the shower and slice that shit wide open. need stitches and everything. i don't know exactly what happened but he stuck to "i dropped it while shaving my chest" just the only thing we could say is WOW.

IeatDogs
25-08-2004, 05:49 PM
OUCH!

I had to have it surgically removed now. Like, because it hangs lower than my right testicle, when I was getting out, the door slammed, and it sliced open my nutsack.

I could actually see the veins and shit that carry the semen, and it was gushing blood and shit. Fuck man I fainted, and my girlfriend came in and was like OMFG and she called an ambulance. They hooked me up to some oxygen, and we were all laughing at how I'm gonna have only one nut.


Then I stopped laughing.
You better not be joking because this isn't a laughing matter. You don't f*ck around with stuff like this it's serious business.

Spire
25-08-2004, 06:12 PM
Stop bitching and make me a sandwhich.

GuinevereLover
25-08-2004, 08:01 PM
Well, Well, Well You now have something in common with Hitler!!

Snoug
25-08-2004, 09:19 PM
The moral of this story is to take better care of our nuts and dont neglect them. :icon_err:

Mandy
25-08-2004, 10:35 PM
I've read everyone's comments, but I still can't figure out if that story is actually true?

Most likely not seeing as how Glare started the thread.

apoggy
25-08-2004, 10:45 PM
What a load of bollocks

frodo1511
25-08-2004, 10:57 PM
Boy, did that make me laugh. :)

Dyce_Blue
26-08-2004, 12:38 AM
I'm still wondering if this story is real...

You could scan in a picture of your hospital receipt or something, then we will be sure.

But, once I saw this picture on one of those weird sites where this skater somehow ripped his sack open. He was carrying his nuts in his hands, not a fun picture...

frodo1511
26-08-2004, 12:42 AM
Just the thought of that kind of thing gives me nightmares.
(Ponders turning on his night-light...)

Kelsey
26-08-2004, 02:57 AM
Wierd.

Dyce_Blue
26-08-2004, 02:59 AM
Wierd.

"W-E-I-R-D"


This is definitely one of those cases...

Mandy
26-08-2004, 03:17 AM
"W-E-I-R-D"


This is definitely one of those cases...

Nice spam.

Dyce_Blue
26-08-2004, 03:30 AM
Nice spam.

That is why they gave me the Ph.D

You're not too bad yourself.

Jacoby
26-08-2004, 03:33 AM
Can we please get back on the retarded topic of Glare lying about his testicles?

Dyce_Blue
26-08-2004, 03:50 AM
If the metal was sharp, why weren't you more careful? Testicles are very important.

At least the shower door didn't pull a Loraina Bobbit on you...

meegaan1
26-08-2004, 04:52 AM
True or not, this thread is turning out to be very amusing. Why be careful around sharp metal objects? They're fun to play with, especially when naked.

deviljet88
26-08-2004, 10:03 AM
Yes, juggle some knives while you're naked. In fact, juggling them with or without clothes is fun.

kilyncw
26-08-2004, 01:23 PM
Yes, juggle some knives while you're naked. In fact, juggling them with or without clothes is fun.

it's more exciting to have a friend thrown them at an apple on your head, but for the sake of this thread you could hold the apple between your thighs.

Liam
26-08-2004, 01:46 PM
Make it interesting and put the apple in your speedos.

kilyncw
26-08-2004, 05:45 PM
Make it interesting and put the apple in your speedos.

woah, that takes fun out of the game, cause if your friend wins, you still lose when the arrow goes up your pee hole, but in any other scenario if he wins you win, if he loses you lose.

hasselbrad
26-08-2004, 06:01 PM
...the baby's arm is holding it. :icon_surp

kilyncw
26-08-2004, 06:15 PM
that's a dead baby joke waiting to happen

hasselbrad
26-08-2004, 06:19 PM
that's a dead baby joke waiting to happen

You have seen King Arthur, haven't you?

kilyncw
26-08-2004, 06:26 PM
yes but only once and i don't have it quoted.

frodo1511
26-08-2004, 09:34 PM
You have seen King Arthur, haven't you?

I still laugh at that joke. Ray Winstone is hilarious.

Richard
26-08-2004, 11:47 PM
Careless... funny, but careless.

Good for laughs, that is all. I'm letting it go now.

I just read the reason behind it. Maybe Glare is telling the truth?

apoggy
27-08-2004, 12:08 AM
Maybe Glare is telling the truth?

What and break the trend of a lifetime? I'm seriously going to lock this if nothing else interesting is added

Jacoby
27-08-2004, 12:19 AM
I'm seriously going to lock this if nothing else interesting is added

Snails can have up to 2,000 teeth!

(Lock this.)

frodo1511
27-08-2004, 12:30 AM
Ants can live for over a week underwater!!!

(seriously, how could someone live if their nut was cut off/damaged beyond repair?)

...Let me rephrase that:
How could someone WANT to live if their nut was cut off/damaged beyond repair?)

apoggy
27-08-2004, 01:40 AM
Why would someone WANT to lie about living with their nut cut off/damaged beyond repair?

We'll never know....