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View Full Version : The mp3 breast implant - wtf?


Digital_Ice
15-10-2005, 01:42 AM
Coming soon: the mp3 breast implant

Here's an appealing thought: an mp3 breast implant which will allow surgically-enhanced girls to store and play back their entire music collections from their 36DD assets.

We kid you not. According to UK tabloid the Sun - ever watchful for life-enhancing technology, especially when it's got a big jubs angle - BT Laboratories bod Ian Pearson reckons breast implants may as well do something useful if they're to be permanently installed, rather than just looking decorative.

Accordingly, he's proposed sticking an mp3 player in one dug, and a storage chip in the other. Quite how playback is achieved we're not quite sure*, but it may well involve the listener burying his or her head in the cleavage for a full stereo effect.

Likewise, God alone knows how you select tracks, but breasts do come equipped with a pleasing alternative to the iPod's selector wheel. We can imagine the scenario: Girlfriend: "Oi, what the bloody hell are you doing?" Boyfriend: "Hold on, I'm just scrolling down to Stairway to Heaven." ®

Bootnote
*Oh, OK then - Ian Pearson said "flexible plastic electronics would sit inside the breast. A signal would be relayed to headphones, while the device would be controlled by Bluetooth using a panel on the wrist". We prefer our solutions, naturally.

http://www.theregister.co.uk/2005/10/13/mp3_breast_implant/

i just thought i'd share...

this bit amused me:
Girlfriend: "Oi, what the bloody hell are you doing?" Boyfriend: "Hold on, I'm just scrolling down to Stairway to Heaven."

deviljet88
15-10-2005, 01:47 AM
Sweet. How many songs does it hold?

Jasmine
15-10-2005, 05:47 AM
I'll get my girlfriend one.

Hazzle
15-10-2005, 09:56 AM
this bit amused me:
Quote:
Girlfriend: "Oi, what the bloody hell are you doing?" Boyfriend: "Hold on, I'm just scrolling down to Stairway to Heaven."

That bit stood out to me too ;)

Sarah
15-10-2005, 05:30 PM
Hmm that can't be healthy.

Rob The BLack Douglas
15-10-2005, 07:42 PM
Sweet. How many songs does it hold?


Probably would depend on the size of the implants ;)

Rob

DragonRat
16-10-2005, 01:27 AM
An audiophile's fantasy come true.

GG Bluetooth.

TrueColours
16-10-2005, 12:29 PM
Haha how would you either charge the batteries or change them? Tehee i have such images in my head right now :D

Jasmine
16-10-2005, 08:39 PM
An audiophile's fantasy come true.

GG Bluetooth.
There's such thing as an autiophile? O.o

meegaan1
17-10-2005, 12:56 AM
I want three!

Digital_Ice
17-10-2005, 05:29 AM
There's such thing as an autiophile? O.o

yes, an audiophile is a lover of music (well actually, the correct definition is literally, "one who loves sound"... and is one who is concerned with achieving high-quality results in the recording and playback of sound... but thats beside the point)

-phile is from the Greek -philos, meaning beloved.

and audio is sound eg music

:p

deviljet88
17-10-2005, 11:34 AM
But an auTiophile... naaah :P

Digital_Ice
18-10-2005, 05:36 AM
i assumed that was a typo... else surely the sentence construct would have been "Is there such thing as an autiophile? O.o" instead of "There's such thing as an autiophile? O.o"

but anyway... back on topic....

Hazzle
18-10-2005, 05:58 AM
Surely in this case it'd be AuTITophile?

hasselbrad
18-10-2005, 02:50 PM
Where would you plug the speakers/headphones in?

Hazzle
18-10-2005, 07:23 PM
Where would you plug the speakers/headphones in?

I know it might've been a while since you got any Brad but you should know that one...

hasselbrad
18-10-2005, 08:10 PM
I know it might've been a while since you got any Brad but you should know that one...

:icon_rofl

DefyingGravity
19-10-2005, 08:57 PM
I found the "Staiway to Heaven" bit very amusing.

I know it might've been a while since you got any Brad but you should know that one...

Haha you're great Haz.

xJellYx
29-10-2005, 07:33 PM
i think it will be highly dangerous and idiotic. Having permanent music in your ear? not for me thanks!

Digital_Ice
29-10-2005, 07:36 PM
i think it will be highly dangerous and idiotic. Having permanent music in your ear? not for me thanks!

personally i think cosmetic surgery is dangerous and idiotic anyway, screw having an mp3 player there.

if you're stupid enough to stick foreign bodies in yourself (no crude comments please haz :P) you may as well make it useful!

Hazzle
30-10-2005, 08:04 PM
if you're stupid enough to stick foreign bodies in yourself (no crude comments please haz :P) you may as well make it useful!

Aww man. And here I was going to make a joke about sex with a Frenchman...