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MeggieHoops
10-01-2005, 08:06 PM
:mad:

Why do men always say one thing and then turn around and do something completely opposite?

My friend Jon, for example, told me that he was practically in love with me and will always be there for me. About 3 days later, he stops calling, texting, and IMing me for no reason whatsoever. I am POSITIVE that I did not do anything to provoke this. I've talked to him about it, and he said that he wouldn't do it again. But did he? Of course.

And my boyfriend, he constantly tells me that he would NEVER do anything to hurt me. And yet he compares me to other girls (girls he used to like, I might add), makes me feel stupid, and then yells and swears at me when I retaliate.

I could name at least 3 other men in my life that have done similar things to me.

I just don't fucking get it.

I realize that this is the "girl's" part of the forum, but men, PLEASE attempt to explain to me why you act like this.

bruman
10-01-2005, 08:10 PM
sorry, i can't help you
never been in love before => dunno why we do it
but i'm sure not all men are like that, i think there are also men that don't do that.

Jacoby
10-01-2005, 08:22 PM
Are you dating or being friends with all similar kinds of guys? It sort of sounds like all of these guys are similar. Find new guys, look for new things in the men. Even if they aren't cute or anything, there's things you become attracted to in people after you spend time with them. I'm not saying you do the opposite of what I just said...I'm just throwing it out there.

hasselbrad
10-01-2005, 08:22 PM
It's not limited to the male of the species. I am going through the same thing right now. I've been dating this woman for almost a month, but there are these strange (and rather disturbing) "communication gaps".
I made plans for us to go out on New Year's Eve and called to let her know on the 30th. We had discussed it and she seemed to be up for anything. I talked to her at lunch and she was with someone so she said she'd call me back. Didn't, so I left messages and figured that she and some of her coworkers had gone out for drinks after work. Also, my daughter was down from the ATL and she was keeping a bit of distance. Next thing I hear from her is a text message on my phone that she's just gotten out of the hospital (she has a problem with her diaphragm) and that she'd call me back. Called an hour later and told me all about it. I cancelled arrangements (on Friday) and then didn't hear from her again until Monday night. I was worried sick, even to the point of calling hospitals, because of what she had already told me.
Met for coffee and a bit of shopping Thursday night, and haven't been able to get in touch with her since. I figure she'll call again tonight and act like it's no big deal. Or, I'll never talk to her again.
God I love dating.

apoggy
10-01-2005, 09:28 PM
Meg, I recommend going out with Jacoby, he wont mess you around.

ryan
10-01-2005, 09:44 PM
:mad:

Why do men always say one thing and then turn around and do something completely opposite?

My friend Jon, for example, told me that he was practically in love with me and will always be there for me. About 3 days later, he stops calling, texting, and IMing me for no reason whatsoever. I am POSITIVE that I did not do anything to provoke this. I've talked to him about it, and he said that he wouldn't do it again. But did he? Of course.

And my boyfriend, he constantly tells me that he would NEVER do anything to hurt me. And yet he compares me to other girls (girls he used to like, I might add), makes me feel stupid, and then yells and swears at me when I retaliate.

I could name at least 3 other men in my life that have done similar things to me.

I just don't fucking get it.

I realize that this is the "girl's" part of the forum, but men, PLEASE attempt to explain to me why you act like this.


1 of the 3 men that have done similar things to you reporting for duty.

the first dude probably realized what he was doing probably wasn't the right thing to do if you weren't returning the favor and is spacing himself from you to help himself fix the problem. he doesn't want you to think anything's wrong because that'll upset you, so he says what he can to get you off his back. give him a little space. he'll come around when he's ready. this is about when he's ready, not when you want him to be ready.
i've done this to people before and it's my way of letting myself get over someone. there needs to be 'alone time' of sorts, so just don't bother him about it. it's like putting butter on a burn.

as for hazzle, he needs to become less defensive and ditch the hoiler than thou attitude. his aggressive actions speak louder than the 'romantic' words he's always throwing at you when he's in a good mood. look at the actions, don't listen to the words. oh, and he has a temper problem. he ought to get that looked at.
i can't say i've ever intentionally made someone feel dumb then had the genius idea to yell at them when they take offense, but if for some reason i did, i'd probably soon lose that relationship because i'm too much of a dumbass to realize what i'm doing. in any event, he needs to snap out of a few things right quick or he'll be even further up shit creek without his proverbial paddle.

MeggieHoops
10-01-2005, 09:54 PM
1 of the 3 men that have done similar things to you reporting for duty.

Hehe, so what's YOUR reasoning for confusing the hell out of me? :p

Anyways...thanks for the advice so far peoples.

ryan
10-01-2005, 09:57 PM
Hehe, so what's YOUR reasoning for confusing the hell out of me? :p

Anyways...thanks for the advice so far peoples.

I have my reasons and my reasons are my own. :)

Besides, I don't think I confuse you all that much.
I fear the anal KKW staff may once again yell at me if I continue this 'conversation' in a casual manner, so I'll just end this post.

duckula
10-01-2005, 11:32 PM
A wise move.

Meggiehoops, if the men treat you like this then sever contact and try to be a better judge of character in the future. Also, it is worth noting that you are the common denominator here.

deviljet88
11-01-2005, 12:11 AM
Dump them all! :D

SimplyKnightley
11-01-2005, 12:19 AM
talk is cheap. ryan is rite. look at the actions, don't listen to the words. some guys are just talkers. words come out casually and freely and high chance they don't even remember what they have said. so take it easy.

JackYang
11-01-2005, 01:15 AM
Sry, can't help you there. I usually do what I say. :icon_mod:

Mandy
11-01-2005, 02:34 AM
as for hazzle, he needs to become less defensive and ditch the hoiler than thou attitude. his aggressive actions speak louder than the 'romantic' words he's always throwing at you when he's in a good mood. look at the actions, don't listen to the words. oh, and he has a temper problem. he ought to get that looked at.



He also needs to move out and get a life, job, place of his own...etc, but that's not really the point of this reply.

One thing I've learned, online relationships never work. Especially when they're in a different country and there's a slim chance of actually meeting them. If you've met them already, it's a different story. But then again, meeting someone for five minutes and deciding that you're soulmates doesn't exactly work either.I know he's supposed to go to New York or whatever, but I think it'd be best to wait until he actually lives there and there's a better chance of the relationship surviving. It's better to talk things out face to face than on the internet or on the phone, anyway.

Internet relationships only get you hurt.

MeggieHoops
11-01-2005, 02:39 AM
He also needs to move out and get a life, job, place of his own...etc, but that's not really the point of this reply.

One thing I've learned, online relationships never work. Especially when they're in a different country and there's a slim chance of actually meeting them. If you've met them already, it's a different story. But then again, meeting someone for five minutes and deciding that you're soulmates doesn't exactly work either.I know he's supposed to go to New York or whatever, but I think it'd be best to wait until he actually lives there and there's a better chance of the relationship surviving. It's better to talk things out face to face than on the internet or on the phone, anyway.

Internet relationships only get you hurt.

True that. We kinda sorta just called things off. :err:

Just to make things clear, this thread wasn't about him completely, so can everyone take their negative attitudes about him and shove them back up their ass? Thanks.

deviljet88
11-01-2005, 03:13 AM
It was also about Ryan.

deviljet88
11-01-2005, 03:18 AM
Sweet, I drive Meggiehoops bonkers without actually talking to her :D

ryan
11-01-2005, 03:37 AM
It was also about Ryan.

don't drag me into this...

Sweet, I drive Meggiehoops bonkers without actually talking to her :D

try talking to her then see how nuts you drive her...

No, it wasn't.

It was about how ALL men are pieces of shit who never do what they say. And it drives me bonkers.

now now, not all of us are like that. as far as i know, i always do as i say regarding you.

MeggieHoops
11-01-2005, 03:45 AM
now now, not all of us are like that. as far as i know, i always do as i say regarding you.

Mm, maybe. But you change your mind about how you feel about me so often that it's hard to keep track.

Liam
11-01-2005, 05:33 AM
If you've met them already, it's a different story. But then again, meeting someone for five minutes blah blah blah

If thats directed at me, I'm touched by your concern. Ta.

IBO
11-01-2005, 05:36 AM
No, it wasn't.

It was about how ALL men are pieces of shit who never do what they say. And it drives me bonkers.


Not ALL men are pieces of shit!

I think Jacoby has the right idea. Look for men with qualities that you wouldn't usually go for, you might discover something about yourself.

:icon_mod: Why Men Lie :icon_mod:

Now folks, someone finally has come up with the reason why men are so misunderstood. Let the girls know. They'll understand, honest.

One day, while a woodcutter was cutting a branch of a tree above a river, his ax fell into the river. When he cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, "Why are you crying?"

The woodcutter replied that his ax had fallen into the water.

The Lord went down into the water and reappeared with a golden ax. "Is this your ax?" the Lord asked.

The woodcutter replied, "No."

The Lord again went down and came up with a silver ax. "Is this your ax?" the Lord asked.

Again, the woodcutter replied, "No."

The Lord went down again and came up with an iron ax. "Is this your ax?" the Lord asked.

The woodcutter replied, "Yes."

The Lord was pleased with the man's honesty and gave him all three axes to keep, and the woodcutter went home happy.

One day while he was walking with his wife along the riverbank, the woodcutter's wife fell into the river. When he cried out, the Lord again appeared and asked him, "Why are you crying?"

"Oh Lord, my wife has fallen into the water!"

The Lord went down into the water and came up with Jennifer Lopez. "Is this your wife?" the Lord asked.

"Yes," cried the woodcutter.

The Lord was furious. "You cheat! That is an untruth!"

The woodcutter replied, "Oh, forgive me, my Lord. It is a misunderstanding. You see, if I said 'no' to Jennifer Lopez, You would come up with Catherine Zeta-Jones. Then if I also said 'no' to her, You would thirdly come up with my wife, and I would say 'yes,' and then all three would be given to me. But Lord, I am a poor man and I would not be able to take care of all three wives, so that's why I said yes this time."

The moral of the story: Whenever a man lies, it is for an honorable and useful reason. :icon_wink
________
LovelyWendie99 (http://www.lovelywendie99.com/)

deviljet88
11-01-2005, 05:54 AM
You're like the next Jesus with even cooler parables :P

Bait
11-01-2005, 06:04 AM
lol IBO that is the best joke or what ever i read on this forum so far :)

anyways you cant generalize all guys like that...because its not true

i almost always do what i say i'll do

example: if a guy told a girl he met at a party that he would call her sometime

did he call her back? (fuck this, yes the story is about me) yes i did, just because it wasnt within the time frame she would like she got mad (it was only a fucking week and a half before i called) but that could have been prevented if she actually called me first if she really wanted to meet me somewhere...
so dont blame guys when the girls are part of the problem too, if not the whole problem

IBO
11-01-2005, 06:12 AM
I just had to Lighten up this thread. No but seriously, Meg you should better judge the men that you wish to have a relationship with. Really get to know the person before taking the next step. Ofcourse not all men are jerks, but unfortunately some are. Just keep your head up and your eyes open and you'll find the right guy.

best of luck!
________
Michigan marijuana dispensaries (http://michigan.dispensaries.org/)

acliff
11-01-2005, 06:38 AM
I for one don't make promises unless I can keep them. If I do make promises, I do everything in my power to keep them. Accidents, traffic jams, freakish weather conditions nonwithstanding.

Bear in mind internet chat is dispassionate, and words can be just put out there, easily forgotten about. People say things on the net that they probably shouldn't, because they cannot directly link it to the consequences of what they've said. Lies come easier, as you don't have shit body language to give you up. Getting to know people on the internet is supposed to make people closer in real life because you get to know their personality first and foremost, and looks and everything else come second. To its credit, internet chatting does do is make things less uncomfortable when you first meet. Then you find out all the things they've been lying about, all the little things you couldn't hate that you haven't seen or experienced yet due to the internet veil...
Besides meghan, you're not a social leper. You're perfectly capable of finding someone who won't fuck you about (unless you're a glutton for punishment, which I don't think and hope you are). Looking beyond the realms of KKW may be a start...

As for your real life friend who loves you, I'd say be cautious of good friends who say they are in love with you. You might keep him around because it makes you feel better about yourself (it is pretty much the ultimate compliment) but he may decide to cut himself off for his own mental sanity.
I might be reading into this wrong, but unrequited love can be a demoralising cunt.

Ranman
14-01-2005, 11:31 PM
Sorry meggiehoops

God made us like that.

NearokA
12-08-2005, 02:19 AM
You need to stop being around girly men and start being around real men. Some facts about real men:

1). Real men say what they mean.
2). Real men do what they say.
3). Real men don't let emotions control a tense situation.
4). Real men don't lose their cool under pressure.
5). Real men handle their business. They don't complain. They don't whine. And they don't cry. They do what needs to be done, be that taking care of a family, going to school, working two jobs, whatever.
6). And finally, real men don't rely on spouts of anger and yelling to handle their women. Real men command respect and know how to communicate.

If your man isn't in compliance to these things, he can only be 1 of 2 things.

1). He's still a boy.
2). He's a girly man. If you want to be with a girly man, that's your choice, and you should live with the consequences.

acliff
12-08-2005, 05:07 PM
You need to stop being around girly men and start being around real men. Some facts about real men:

1). Real men say what they mean.
2). Real men do what they say.
3). Real men don't let emotions control a tense situation.
4). Real men don't lose their cool under pressure.
5). Real men handle their business. They don't complain. They don't whine. And they don't cry. They do what needs to be done, be that taking care of a family, going to school, working two jobs, whatever.
6). And finally, real men don't rely on spouts of anger and yelling to handle their women. Real men command respect and know how to communicate.

If your man isn't in compliance to these things, he can only be 1 of 2 things.

1). He's still a boy.
2). He's a girly man. If you want to be with a girly man, that's your choice, and you should live with the consequences.

Omg what are you doing back here? Weren't you shooed off for being mentally and emotionally challenged? If you've grown up since your last visit, all good, although I doubt it, considering you're replying to 8 month old threads, which common sense states is now a dead discussion...

a ring in return
15-08-2005, 12:05 PM
You need to stop being around girly men and start being around real men. Some facts about real men:

1). Real men say what they mean.
2). Real men do what they say.
3). Real men don't let emotions control a tense situation.
4). Real men don't lose their cool under pressure.
5). Real men handle their business. They don't complain. They don't whine. And they don't cry. They do what needs to be done, be that taking care of a family, going to school, working two jobs, whatever.
6). And finally, real men don't rely on spouts of anger and yelling to handle their women. Real men command respect and know how to communicate.

If your man isn't in compliance to these things, he can only be 1 of 2 things.

1). He's still a boy.
2). He's a girly man. If you want to be with a girly man, that's your choice, and you should live with the consequences.

You forgot to add 7). Do not use words like girly men.

hasselbrad
15-08-2005, 05:23 PM
You need to stop being around girly men and start being around real men. Some facts about real men:

1). Real men say what they mean.
2). Real men do what they say.
3). Real men don't let emotions control a tense situation.
4). Real men don't lose their cool under pressure.
5). Real men handle their business. They don't complain. They don't whine. And they don't cry. They do what needs to be done, be that taking care of a family, going to school, working two jobs, whatever.
6). And finally, real men don't rely on spouts of anger and yelling to handle their women. Real men command respect and know how to communicate.

If your man isn't in compliance to these things, he can only be 1 of 2 things.

1). He's still a boy.
2). He's a girly man. If you want to be with a girly man, that's your choice, and you should live with the consequences.


Good to see you are still reading and regurgitating bullshit self help nonsense.

acliff
15-08-2005, 05:31 PM
Real men also have 46 inch chests, 28 inch waists, can bench press cars, 20 inch arms, and smoke cigars, and rescue women from dragons. Before bonking them over the heads with a club, dragging them back to their cave and bonking them, and 6 weeks later have 20 children.

Liam
15-08-2005, 06:03 PM
You need to stop being around girly men and start being around real men. Some facts about real men:

1). Real men say what they mean.
2). Real men do what they say.
3). Real men don't let emotions control a tense situation.
4). Real men don't lose their cool under pressure.
5). Real men handle their business. They don't complain. They don't whine. And they don't cry. They do what needs to be done, be that taking care of a family, going to school, working two jobs, whatever.
6). And finally, real men don't rely on spouts of anger and yelling to handle their women. Real men command respect and know how to communicate.

If your man isn't in compliance to these things, he can only be 1 of 2 things.

1). He's still a boy.
2). He's a girly man. If you want to be with a girly man, that's your choice, and you should live with the consequences.

This is the sort of bullshit you would find in a teenage gossip magazine. I wouldn't be surprised if it was directly lifted from Cosmo.com.

hasselbrad
15-08-2005, 06:42 PM
Oh, and holy fucking thread bump. January to August...and no pining for Keira's recently broken heart? Jeez "manly-man", you're losing your edge.

Pygmalion
19-09-2005, 11:37 PM
If you ARE the type to like dating the girly men why not just date girls?

deviljet88
20-09-2005, 12:05 AM
Penis.

Pygmalion
20-09-2005, 12:39 AM
Are you trying to confess something here Jet?

deviljet88
20-09-2005, 09:14 AM
I like my one and noone elses.

Rob The BLack Douglas
27-09-2005, 04:20 AM
Real men wear kilts.

Rob

Rob The BLack Douglas
28-09-2005, 04:12 AM
Real members have read the posting guidelines and know that animated avatars are not allowed.

What? So I'm not real? I missed that bit, when I read. You could of just sent a friendly pm.

And by the way what's the problem with animated avatar's if they are within the parameter's?

Rob

deviljet88
28-09-2005, 04:13 AM
What? So I'm not real? I missed that bit, when I read, chill.

And by the way what's the problem with animated avatar's if they are within the parameter's?

Rob
The fact that they are animated. Might give people epilepsy, I don't know, spam Barrington.

Rob The BLack Douglas
28-09-2005, 04:16 AM
The fact that they are animated. Might give people epilepsy, I don't know, spam Barrington.


That's reasonable, just don't care for the attitude. Could of been friendlier.

Rob

deviljet88
28-09-2005, 04:17 AM
That's reasonable, just don't care for the attitude. Could of been friendlier.

Rob
Flightfreak is having romance troubles, ignore him.

Rob The BLack Douglas
28-09-2005, 04:18 AM
Thanks for the heads up mate.

Rob

Hazzle
28-09-2005, 06:18 AM
I think it's to do with people on slower modems. Or something. Or maybe Baz just doesn't like animations because they're heterosexually challenged?